Observing Communication
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It is amazing what we can see and hear when we take the time to
just listen to some conversations, and watch and observe behaviors and body
language. Many adults believe that they are entitled to correct children, so they
usually over correct them. Most adults also believe that they can say anything
they want to children, and say it the way they want to with little to no regard
for how the child must feel.
During the school week, I observed a conversation, well, maybe a one-way
conversation between a 2nd grade student, and his teacher. We were
at lunch and recess when something flew across the class lunch table.
I also noticed that the student had trouble focusing and keeping a
calm and happy through the rest of the day.
Tim’s self-esteem was challenged and he must have felt embarrassed
before his peers. This is not the first time I witnessed this type of
misunderstanding. When I think about it, I begin to ponder on how many young
children are being hurt and embarrassed with a crushed spirit. As adults, we
must be fully aware of our practices of the children in our care. We must be
aware of what we are saying to our students, and how we are saying it. According
to Rainer, & Durden, “teacher’s words and the way they use them create
meaning for children as well as for themselves”; additionally, it is important
to consider the actual words we say to children” (2010). When we are speaking
to someone we should be respectful and kind. We tend to get positive responses
from those that we are speaking with. Even babies are to be approached with
kindness and respect. As reported by Kovach, & Da Ros-Voseles, when a baby “knows
what comes next can reduce anxiety” and that, “speaking directly to the baby”,
and “calling the baby by his, or her name” are positive and successful ways of
communication.
References
Kovach, B., & Da Ros-Voseles, D. (2011). Communicating with
babies. YC: Young Children, 66(2), 48-50. Retrieved from the Walden
Library using the Education Research Complete database. http://ezp.waldenulibrary.org/login?url=http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=ehh&AN=60001533&site=eh
ost-live&scope=site
Rainer Dangei, J., & Durden, T. R. (2010). The nature of
teacher talk during small group activities. YC:
Young Children, 65(1), 74-81. Retrieved from the Walden Library using the
Education Research Complete database. http://ezp.waldenulibrary.org/login?url=http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=ehh&AN=47964033&site=ehost-live&scope=site
Darlene,
ReplyDeleteI cannot stand it when a teacher will not listen to what really happen. They see one thing and automatically think they are right. This happened so many times to me as a child. If the teacher would have just stopped and listen they would have found out that was not the real story. I see this especially if the child already gets in trouble a lot. Instead of discovering the truth some teachers think it is okay to accept things at face value leavings them as you said with a crushed spirit. Regardless of how much extra time and effort it may take we need to stop and listen to all sides of the story. No matter how flat you make a pancake it still has two sides and it is up to the teacher to listen to both. Great Post!
Darlene,
ReplyDeleteI have seen many teachers discipline a particular student because they are usually the one always in trouble and starting problems. In my 20 plus years of teaching, I have had administration come and talk to me about an incident that I knew nothing about. One time, my aide was the in the bathroom talking on the phone and not in the mainstreaming class with a student. My principal began accusing me of not having good leadership skills as I my aide was not where she was supposed to be. When I was finally able to say that my aide left my room with the student and I had no way of knowing that she was not where she was supposed to be after she left my room, the principal apologized but it still affects me to this day. I sometimes think I micro-manage my staff now. I was an adult and it had a great impact on me to be talked to like this so I can imagine how it affected the student. I was able to have a say in my defense. The child never got a chance to explain what really happened and had to take the discipline that was not deserved. How sad for that child.
Mary
Darlene, this is very interesting I see this everyday at school. I feel that you are right that we as teacher need to look at the way we talk to children, it can bring down there self esteem, and for one we need to listen to them it is not always that child fault when you look at the picture, we as teacher just call on the one we know that gives us the most trouble, we need to given them a chance to explain what happened and then take action.
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